For my thirty-one day series you can scroll to the bottom, or you can read first why I decided to participate in this years event.
I had high aspirations of writing about moving beyond borders. How I found freedom in God. The plan was drawn and the writing began. And so did the migraines and illness that has haunted my body for most of my life. My hope faded. Discouragement settled in. And then the unexpected happened.
On October 15, 2011, my daddy went in the hospital for what seemed like the billionth time. We had been through this routine over and over again. Each and every time believing this was his last, and by nothing short of a miracle, he walked out those doors. Much to the astonishment of all his doctors, he was off to live another day. But this time… this time was different. On October 23, 2011, at 11:03 pm he took his last breath and Jesus welcomed him home.
My world shifted that day. It quaked right open and my faith fell straight through the crack. I held white knuckled on to the little faith that remained. And as everything in the world around seemed to be going as usual. I was standing still right in the middle watching it play out like a movie. I was numb. And I was stuck.
October is approaching and once again The Nester is hosting thirty-one days. And after much thought and prayer I have decided to participate. I am dreading October this year as it will mark a year of my daddy’s passing. I know that does not change anything, but in my mind it makes it final. Maybe real? And this is why I am participating. To mark my progress in walking through the dark. To remind how God brought me through and is mending the broken places. So when that day comes… when thoughts flood of that day… I will remember the good. I will remember God.
Thirty One Days Walking Through Darkness