Beyond Borders

courage. faith. action.

Thirty-one Days Walking Through Dark

6 Comments

For my thirty-one day series you can scroll to the bottom, or you can read first why I decided to participate in this years event.

20120927-153312.jpg Thirty-one days. Thirty one days of writing on the same subject. The Nester hosts this amazing event each year. Last year hundreds of bloggers participated. I was one of them.

I had high aspirations of writing about moving beyond borders. How I found freedom in God. The plan was drawn and the writing began. And so did the migraines and illness that has haunted my body for most of my life. My hope faded. Discouragement settled in. And then the unexpected happened.

On October 15, 2011, my daddy went in the hospital for what seemed like the billionth time. We had been through this routine over and over again. Each and every time believing this was his last, and by nothing short of a miracle, he walked out those doors. Much to the astonishment of all his doctors, he was off to live another day. But this time… this time was different. On October 23, 2011, at 11:03 pm he took his last breath and Jesus welcomed him home.

My world shifted that day. It quaked right open and my faith fell straight through the crack. I held white knuckled on to the little faith that remained. And as everything in the world around seemed to be going as usual. I was standing still right in the middle watching it play out like a movie. I was numb. And I was stuck.

October is approaching and once again The Nester is hosting thirty-one days. And after much thought and prayer I have decided to participate. I am dreading October this year as it will mark a year of my daddy’s passing. I know that does not change anything, but in my mind it makes it final. Maybe real? And this is why I am participating. To mark my progress in walking through the dark. To remind how God brought me through and is mending the broken places. So when that day comes… when thoughts flood of that day… I will remember the good. I will remember God.

Thirty One Days Walking Through Darkness

Day One :: Defining the Dark

Day Two:: The Slide

Day Three :: And Midnight Falls

Day Four :: The Break

Day Five :: Welcome Home

Day Six :: Thoughts are Reckless

Day Seven :: It’s a Choice

Day Eight :: How to Find God

Day Nine :: He’s Calling for Me
Day Ten :: Getting it Right

Day Eleven :: Time Travel. Not just for Sci-Fi Movies

Day Twelve :: The Neon Sign Flickers

Day Thirteen :: I Did Nothing

Day Fourteen :: The Signs

Day Fifteen :: We Stood on Holy Ground

Day Sixteen :: We Stood on Holy Ground Part 2

Day Seventeen :: One Can Learn Much From a Child

Day Eighteen :: He Meets Me in My Mourning

Day Nineteen :: The Needle Pierced

Day Twenty :: In My Daddy’s Words – Part One

Day Twenty-one :: In My Daddy’s Words – Part Two

Day Twenty-two :: In My Daddy’s Words – Part Three

Day Twenty-three :: The Choice is Yours

Day Twenty-four :: The Day My Daddy Died

Day Twenty-five :: Moving Forward

Author: Shelly Richardson

A stay at home mom, married to my best friend, who loves like Jesus. Together we have four beautiful daughters. One biological, one adopted and two by way of marriage. Our 12 year old daughter was diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome when she was 6 years old and our youngest was diagnosed with autism at 3 years old. I have dealt with chronic illness most of my life and at times has been debilitating. It is through this illness and the special needs of our children that drew us closer to God. Beyond Borders is the place where I write out my story of living beyond my borders. A place to share of God’s love and grace, His mercy and sovereignty, and what that looks like in my own little world of chronic illness and autism. A place where courage and faith intersect and He moves me to action. My hope in writing is that you find something that inspires you. Encourages you. Makes you smile.

6 thoughts on “Thirty-one Days Walking Through Dark

  1. I was scrolling through Nester’s links and your title was like a beacon, so I started reading. You’re a great writer! I thought about participating, but it would be just one more pressure. You see I have been stuck for many, many years, myself and I am finally pulling myself out and am working like 18 hours a day. (most of it is very enjoyable, however). I won’t go into all of the reasons why, because this is the real me–lol (I do have an anonymous blog that tells all) but just know… I finally found the strength to leave.:[ Is is what I wanted? No, it is not, but I cannot control the actions of others and yet, their actions have had quite an effect on me and are not something I can live with. I will pray for you because God IS with you–always–even when the it all becomes too much to bear. I am Jewish, but we have the SAME God. :] I believe that when we are in great pain its simply a sign that something is very, very wrong. It may not be something that we are ready to face, but the moment we do, suddenly the doors open up with warm, embracing sunshine. I am so sorry about your health and your father’s passing. I lost my dear brother 25 years ago. It truly sucks, doesn’t it? Sometimes, we are forced into decisions we don’t have to want to make. Sometimes the choices seem to be nil. Sometimes we are so afraid that the alternatives will be worse. It is scary for me, to be going out on my own, but it is also extremely liberating to finally be moving forward. Don’t give up. The answers are there for you too and you will find them when the time is right. I believe that with all my heart!
    xo ~ L

    • Laurel, thank you for reading. You should share your anonymous blog, from what you wrote I think we may have gone through something similar. God has been so good during this past year and I am excited to be writing about it over these next 31 days. I hope you follow along.

  2. If you can see my email address, please write me privately and I will send you the link. its the internet, ya know… it probably is the same thing. ugh. yeah… I adored my husband so much. so painful and it invades every corner and crevice of my life. Oh, and do you have a child with Asperger’s? My second son is on the spectrum and goes to a therapeutic boarding school.(paid for by our school district, of course!) Now THAT is a God-send like none other!

  3. Pingback: Thirty-one days Walking Through Darkness Day Three :: And Midnight Falls « Beyond Borders

  4. an old friend doing 31 like me! lovely to be back, having lost my oen dad your theme has me in tears already! cant wait to follow your 31 days x

  5. Pingback: 31 Days of Randomness- Personal Inspiration 7 – Going SMALL | rfljenksy – Practicing Simplicity

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